Monogram A WIP

Monogram A WIP ©Angela Porter | Artwyrd.com
Monogram A WIP ©Angela Porter | Artwyrd.com

Easy listening playlist on Spotify, creating art. What a lovely way to spend a Saturday morning!

I’ve been working at this monogram now for several days. It is coming along.

It really feels like a an embroidery sampler where the learning embroiderer would try out different patterns and shapes and still create something beautiful.

For me, the sampler is more about out different ideas as they come to me and increasing my knowledge and understanding of the digital art tools available to me in Autodesk Sketchbook Pro.

Of course being able to draw directly on the screen of my Microsoft Surface Studio with a Surface Pen makes creating digital art a dream for me; it’s like working with pens and pencils and so on on paper. However, I’m able to do things I don’t think I’d ever be able to do with traditional media.

I still love working with pen on paper; I currently have one drawing on the go and I may convert it into a digital artwork when it’s done.

Exploring the realms of digital art has opened doors to me that have expanded my creativity in ways I never could have imaged previously.

Yes, I learn by doing myself rather than following tutorials. My experience of watching tutorials is that I end up more confused than I started.

Don’t get me wrong, the ones I watched were excellent. However, they are by people who really know the software and what everything does, and they speak to people who have some idea of it all.

Besides, I want to do art my way, and these artists tend to show how they do things and that often doesn’t make any sense to me.

I’m grateful they share, and one day I may watch some more, but for now the exploration in my own realms of creativity is what is best for me.

As I look at my sampler monogram, I can see how I’m developing my own digital art voice in terms of techniques and effects that suit my style of rather intricate, abstract art based on patterns, curves, swirls and arches, along with a lot of motifs based on nature.

The plain curves in this monogram are adding some much needed scaffolding or girders to support and separate the patterns. Some of the fancily patterned curves are getting lost in the crazy intricacy of adjoining sections.

There are no individual sections that I really don’t like. However, some combinations of sections don’t seem to gel well, at least not to my eye.

What I do love is the layers of diversity of colour and pattern. Each glance reveals something new, whether it’s the way I’ve played with light and shadow, the way patterns look together, or the way colours I’d not normally put together seem to work together.

However, as this is turning out to be a sampler, then that’s fine. It’s all learning for me, and that’s good.

I’ve noticed I’ve not left any white space in this design, so far. I may do that in the area that is left to complete, just to contrast with the pattern-dense areas done so far.

It is a fascinating journey for me, and while this may not be an artwork that I’d offer for sale at redbubble.com or zippi, it’s something that is worth its weight in gold for me in terms of lessons learned and also gaining some confidence in my style of digital art.

Another monogram A WIP

Another Monogram A WIP ©Angela Porter |Artwyrd.com
Another Monogram A WIP ©Angela Porter |Artwyrd.com

I was looking at the monogram I started a few days back and I’m really not happy with it at the moment. I don’t like the shape of the letter. So, I thought I’d try out a more ‘blocky’ letter. I also thought I’d try filling the letter with abstract patterns and shapes to see how that goes too.

You can see the result of my last two or three hours of work. I like what’s happening here, but I’m not too sure about my colour choices. Time to get limited colour palettes going again I think!

I’m perplexed as to how I can so easily create abstract mandalas that are really quite complex, but something like this seems to cause me no end of troubles.

I will persevere. I always do when it’s art.

As usual, I’m using Autodesk Sketchbook Pro along with a Microsoft Surface Pen and Surface Studio.

So, tell me Angela, how are you today?

I’m tired. I’m content but feeling ‘flat’ at the same time. The ‘flatness’ is draining some of the contentedness away from me today. I don’t feel as ebullient as I did in the last week.

EMDR yesterday was puzzling, confusing and overwhelming. I also think I went with the expectation of the same kind of thing happening as last week.

It didn’t.

Last week, we worked with one negative belief about myself and the image that popped up when I thought of myself as a baby or child while holding that belief and the feelings it generated inside me.

This week I went to therapy with an image of a ‘monster’ that had cropped up this week.

While processing in EMDR, the negative thoughts just kept coming and coming. The pain and sensations in my body were quite overwhelming.

At the end of the session, my therapist said we need to go back to how we’d worked in the last couple of weeks.

I agreed.

I’m so glad that despite the tiredness and flatness, the contentedness is still there, despite me feeling deflated from EMDR yesterday. Me being overly tired isn’t really helping things either.

I left the session feeling tired and I wanted to sleep. I couldn’t, however, as I had a commitment in the evening. That left me more tired. I really haven’t slept enough overnight to overcome the tiredness. It’ll soon be time to nap I think!

However, I did wake up with an idea about what I could do about a monogram, and wanted to explore that.

I also have to remind myself that yesterday in EMDR wasn’t a step backwards. It was finding out that the way to work is with a negative belief, just one, to prevent overwhelming, confusing sessions. Maybe not a lot of processing was done yesterday, but a lesson was learned.

On a positive note, I did some ‘adulting’ yesterday that involved going into a branch of my bank to pay a couple of cheques in and to enquire as to whether I’d received a payment, and to get the online banking thingy sorted it. It won’t let me log on. I can’t log on until I recieve this card reader thingy, but it should be a lot easier to do so in the future – woohoo!

I also had lunch in the park in Neath. Eating while out and about can be a huge problem for me, but yesterday I had the courage to do this again.

So, when I see those two things, I can see how much progress I have made, even though the tiredness and deflation are sapping me of a little bit of positivity today.

It’s only temporary, the tiredness and deflation. A nap could seriously help me out!

Hello July!

July 2019 Colouring Template for members of the Angela Porter Illustrator's Coloring Book Fans facebook group ©Angela Porter 2019 | Artwyrd.com
July 2019 Colouring Template for members of the Angela Porter Illustrator’s Coloring Book Fans facebook group ©Angela Porter 2019 | Artwyrd.com

Can you believe it? Half of 2019 has passed to history. Time has flown by.

With the start of July I also have an exclusive coloring template available free to members of the Angela Porter’s Coloring Book Fans facebook group.

This is my way of saying thank you to those who follow my work, particularly the colouring books I have created.

If you’d like to download and colour, you need to be a member of the group and agree to follow the T’s & C’s.

I’m looking forward to seeing what members of the group will do with this one! I love to see the different colour schemes and media that they use to bring the drawing to life with the magic of colour.

To create this template, I started with a sketch on square gridded paper. It was a very basic sketch with just outline shapes, lines and so on. I then scanned it into the Surface Studio and completed this drawing using my Surface Pen along with Autodesk Sketchbook Pro.

I had to include some of my favourite design elements – butterflies, stars, flowers, fungi, seed pods, arches and geometric patterns.

It was fun to draw, even the sketch was as I love to use a Koh-i-Noor Magic pencil to do the sketching with, one that has quite different colours in the lead so that I get a fair rainbow of colours.

I’m warming to sketching things out before drawing them in ink (either traditional ink/pens or digital) to give me a skeleton I can put flesh on in terms of details and patterns.

So Angela Porter, how are you feeling today?

I’m feeling contented. My stomach/digestive system is back to normal. All just in time for today’s EMDR session this afternoon.

That’s all I have to say about that today. I’m sure I’ll have more tomorrow post EMDR.

“Inspiration” WIP

Inspiration WIP ©Angela Porter 2019 - Artwyrd.com
Inspiration WIP ©Angela Porter 2019 – Artwyrd.com

I’ve started colouring “Inspiration”, the drawing I completed yesterday.

The drawing was done with a Tombow Fudenosuke and a Lamy medium fountain pen on Winsor and Newton Bristol Board. I’m colouring it digitally using my favourite trio of Autodesk Sketchbook Pro, Microsoft Surface Pen and Microsoft Surface Studio.

So far, I’ve spent 3 hours colouring, so it’s going to take me a while longer to complete.

To be honest, it would be a lot quicker to colour using Chameleon markers or other traditional media. Weird, when computers make doing other tasks so much quicker and easier.

That doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy adding colour. I mean, I could do that a lot quicker if I chose to use gradient fills. However, this time I wanted to add colour as if I was using traditional media, being able to follow the shapes of the design more closely, having more control over where I add shadows and highlights.

So, I’ll take the time over this one, like I do with many of my artworks.

So, how are you today Angela?

EMDR yesterday was a little different. We didn’t do any EMDR but we worked with my inner child on helping her to heal from past traumas.

I felt silly and daft initially. I didn’t have a clue what I was being asked to do, but my therapist guided me through the process, and eventually I relaxed a little and tried.

I was surprised. Emotional too. It’s not something that I’m comfortable sharing other than in general.

After EMDR I spent sometime in a Starbucks drinking tea, eating a piece of chocolate truffle cake and drawing. Partly this was to wait out the rush hour, mostly it was to give myself a treat after sticking with a therapy session that seemed silly and turned out to be an emotional, insightful and helpful process.

So, the healing journey from CPTSD continues, taking an unexpected turn.

Yesterday, as the sun came out as the day waned my mood brightened a little from just about content to a little more on the happy side. Today I’m a bit tired after a broken night’s sleep with weird dreams but I’m quite content.

Inspiration – Entangled drawing

Inspiration © Angela Porter 2019 - Artwyrd.com
Inspiration © Angela Porter 2019 – Artwyrd.com

My morning task, afore heading out for my EMDR session later, was to finish this drawing.

I used a combination of a Tombow Fudenosuke pen along with a medium nib Lamy fountain pen on Winsor and Newton Bristol Board, A4 in size, to draw this design and add the hand lettering.

The white space really helps to break up the intricate details; helps to separate out the sections and gives the eyes and brain a bit of a rest from it.

I will add colour to this in the fullness of time, most probably digitally.

So, how are you today Angela?

I’m content. Not quite as smiley happy as yesterday, but content. Calm too, or relatively so. There’s a low level background noise of anxiety there.

I do wonder if the weather affects my moods more than I thought it did. Yesterday was both sunny and rainy – rather heavy spells of rain. The sun and driving in the sun was lovely and helped to lift my spirits somewhat.

Today there’s no sun. Just grey clouds and there’s been rain. I’m not quite as tickettyboo as yesterday.

I think I may need to add a weather tracker to my BuJo alongside my mood tracker to see if there is a correlation.

I have my EMDR session in a couple of hours time. I have no idea how that will affect me at this point in time, nor what memory we’ll work on. I won’t dwell or ruminate on it for now. Just get myself sorted to make the hour-long journey to Neath in a little while. Yes, I think that’s best for now.

June dangle design

June Dangle Design © Angela Porter 2019 - Artwyrd.com
June Dangle Design © Angela Porter 2019 – Artwyrd.com

It’s dangle day Friday!

Elsewhere on the interwebs it’s #furbabyfriday, but here, in the tiny corner of the web that is Artwyrd.com it’s dangle day.

It’s getting close to the end of May, so I thought today I’d create a dangle design for June. This would work really well as the monthly cover page for a BuJo or in a scrapbook, journal, planner, diary, greeting card, or anything else you can image it being used.

I did sketch this out in pencil on paper, but then I re-drew, hand lettered and coloured digitally using my usual trifecta of Microsoft Surface Pen, Microsoft Surface Studio and Autodesk Sketchbook Pro.

On Wednesday I had a trip to Hereford for a meeting in the evening. On the way I stopped at my most favourite Romanesque church in Kilpeck to do some drawing. I included some patterns based on this visit in the charms and also the border under the plant pots.

As the Summer Solstice occurs in June, I wanted to include a lovely golden Sun, as well as plenty of golden tones. Also, the clear blues of summer skies and the aquas of sea and lake were a must as well. Cacti, succulents and flowering plants reside in the simple plant pots, with simple monograms on each pot. Of course I have beads and a heart as part of the design too.

I added a textured background upon which I layered a drop shadow for the dangle design.

So many ways that this design could be coloured. I’m quite happy with my design. I’m certainly happy with the line art, but I’m really not confident about my choices of colours. I do feel I’m struggling with colour at the moment.

A Dangle A Day” is my tutorial book that shows you how, step by step, to create dangle designs.

My CPTSD healing journey

Wednesday I was surprisingly content and managed to stop at Kilepeck Church, just outside Hereford. I usually visit the church once a year to soak up the awe and wonder and joy I feel looking at the Romanesque sculpture of this tiny three celled church.

I had my Dingbats quadrille A5 notebook with me, which is my current sketchbook. I spent a happy or or so inside the church taking my time to look at patterns and textures and to deconstruct then reconstruct them in thumbnail sketches.

It was really quiet and serene there; just what I needed.

Also, I’d packed up a light meal in a cool bag so I could have a late tea before going on to my meeting in the evening. I thought this was wise as the problems I have eating out when on my own could preclude me getting something to eat/drink. I found somewhere quiet with lovely views to park up and enjoy my light meal and some more quiet time.

My evening was long and I didn’t return home until nearly midnight. The stress being around people I don’t know also took its toll on me. So yesterday I was wiped out yet again.

I had to find my strength to get out to go and vote in the EU elections and to do some shopping, but this absolutely drained me.

When I’m this tired it is all too easy for me to be emotionally fragile and for this to impact on my mental health.

I caught myself having thoughts that were very unkind and hateful towards myself at times yesterday.

I’m still tired today, but feeling a bit more emotionally resilient. I’ve found the confidence to create art, something I didn’t have yesterday.

The ripples from EMDR and other stuff over the past couple of weeks still have energy, sometimes they’re more like storm waves. Storms pass. Waters calm eventually, with ripples that are easy to ride.

I think I’ve had a couple of storm waves approaching the size of tsunamis in the past couple of weeks and they’ve really drained me.

However, it’s all part of the healing journey. After all, I am a lot better now than I was a few weeks ago, a few months ago, a year ago, a few years ago …

“I can do this” – finished drawing

"I can do this" finished drawing © Angela Porter 2019 - Artwyrd.com
“I can do this” finished drawing © Angela Porter 2019 – Artwyrd.com

Drawing finished

I have, finally, finished this particular drawing. I managed to keep to my challenge of leaving some white space in the design. I did let the design spill over the pencil guidelines I’d drawn for the size of artwork. I then digitally trimmed it within those lines before applying the black and white borders. I do like to define the space within which my drawings and designs reside, that’s for sure. It’s like a window into my imagination, my mind, my intuitive creativity, how all the little things I have observed and imagine just blend and meld into a crazily layered, intricately pattern and yet flowing design that is always quite pretty.

You can’t have too much pretty patterns in this world I think.

I think it’s too detailed and fussy as a coloring template, though I may add some colour to it at some point in time. Before I think about doing that, though, I have an idea for another drawing with some hand lettering on it.

The drawing is a little less than A4 in size (US letter). It has been drawn with Tombow Fudenosuke and Uniball Unipin pens on Winsor and Newton Bristol Board.

My mental and emotional health

Monday I spent mostly in tears after the busy week and the emotional upsets of Sunday. In therapy we just talked about what happened and how I was feeling and thinking about myself and that I need to be a lot kinder to and caring of myself. It was also suggested I need to be a lot more accepting of where I am on my healing journey and not beat myself up for not being able to get out and about much by myself, even when I may want to.

I came home and slept until 2am, then went back to sleep a couple of hours later and slept through until mid morning yesterday, which was then followed by a very quiet day at home crocheting and drawing before yet another nap in the afternoon.

I slept for many hours last night too, and I’m still feeling exhausted. With exhaustion I am emotionally fragile and vulnerable too.

So, much of today will be spent quietly. I do have to head up to Hereford this evening, however. I’m debating whether to go a little early so I can spend a little time at Kilpeck church – my favourite church in the whole wide world. A tiny two celled Romanesque church, almost untouched by time. I’ll see how I feel as the day progresses and whether I manage to find a little oompf. After all, the church has been there for nearly one thousand years, I don’t think it’s going to go anywhere soon!