Intuitive Abstract Art

The last couple or so days I’ve been immersed in drawing intuitive, abstract art. I really wanted to bring one to life with colour, but the ones drawn on A4 paper just felt too much to do.

My solution? Cut some paper into smaller pieces and use one of them! So I did. The paper is 14cm x 7cm and is Canson Imagine mixed media paper. To draw the design I used a TWISBI Eco filled with black Dokumentus ink and fitted with an extra fine nib.

I just let the lines flow as they needed to, each one leading to the next, doing whatever felt right.

Then, it was time to add colour and I dug into my Inktense pencils. This time, I layered colours to get the intensity of colour I wanted and added highlights with a white pigment gel pen from Pentel.

Oddly, I didn’t want to add much in the way of patterns or details in the sections. I just thought they were just fine as they are.

I’m left puzzling a little as to why eyes so often appear in my intuitive art. I don’t even realise I’m drawing or have drawn them until the drawing is done!

As it’s intuitive art, it speaks for what is going on within me. The shapes and lines and colours chosen represent my inner wellbeing in terms of my mind and emotions. Or maybe they speak about what I need at this time. Blue for peace, calm, tranquility. Pinks for gentleness, compassion and kindness towards myself. The purple is more to do with the wonders there are in nature and the universe and life. The threads of gold … well … light, warmth, sunshine that supports the vast majority of life on this planet…child-like joy, pleasure, wonder with what I have in my life, the things that are precious, golden, to me.

It’s easy when the traumas of the past rear their heads and do their best to drag me down into a dark abyss of the heart and mind. I think I needed to do this drawing today to help remind me of what there is in me and what I need at this time.

My intuitive, entangled, abstract art is perhaps the most personal kind of art I share with people. It comes from within, from my heart and soul, not my head. And today was the day I fully realised that this is why I create art like this, and almost face palm at how long it’s taken me to realise it! Almost facepalmed…as I also know these insights and realisations come when we’re ready for them.

All the same, I feel kind of exposed when I share this kind of art as you get to see past the mask I wear to try to fit into a world where I feel out of step, awkward, clumsy, weird, different, a square peg in a world that only has round holes for round pegs. I’ve always felt that way and I’m on a journey to discover why that is.

Through this kind of art, I get to express my sense of wonder and emotions that aren’t easy to access. The visual-hoard of patterns and shapes and forms that is stored in my subconscious flows out naturally and easily in ways that are pleasing to me, and I’m really chuffed if you find them pleasing too!

An Entangled Colouring Page

This week’s colouring page for the Angela Porter’s Colouring Books Fans facebook group is a typically ‘Angela’ entangled design. I enjoyed the process of drawing it, very much.

The design was drawn with a medium nib TWISBI Eco fountain pen filled with Documentus Ink on an A4 sheet of Canson Imagine mixed media paper.

I’ve added colour digitally, so making this tradigital art! Why digital colouring? Well, partly because I can, but also I can try different colours out.

Adding colour was interesting it seems. I started thinking I’d use softer, more muted, less saturated colours. But that soon changed, without any conscious decision, to richer and glowing jewel-like or metallic colours.

As I tend to work very intuitively, whether drawing or adding colour, what appears in my creation is an expression of my unconscious, inner self. I’m sure there’s a message of some kind here for me about me!

Tangle Pattern Sampler

YouTube #DrawWithMe Video Part 1
YouTube #DrawWithMe Video Part 2

About the pattern sampler

This little pattern sampler has been fun to do! I’ve used patterns inspired by the work of Rebecca Blair, some Zentangle style tangle patterns, and possibly some variations of my own too.

I do love Rebecca’s work. I can see the influence of medieval manuscripts on her work and her love of pattern, texture and a wonderful use of textured lines too! The simplicity of her colour palettes and the myriad of ways she combines her signature patterns/textures is wonderful! I really do suggest you take a look at her work on Instagram.

I used a piece of Ohuhu marker paper that measures 4″ x 7″ ( approx 10cm x 1.7cm) and marked out the basic sections with a Uni Kuru Toga 0.3 mechanical pencil (and a ruler for the straight lines). The pencil lines were just a guide for me.

In the first video, I did most of the black line work using an 03 Sakura Pigma Micron pen. In part 2, I added colour using Winsor and Newton Promarkers in Ivory, Sandstone and Caramel.

After that, I added some fine line work and some colours using three Stabilo Point88 0.4 fine pens. These had olive-green kind of tones to them that worked well with the soft browns of the Promarkers.

I also added some black lines in places using a 0.1 UniPin fineliner pen.

Finally, I added highlights using white gel pens.

I really like the more monochrome, subdued colours of this finished drawing. The various panels really do have the feel of a needlework or cross-stitch sampler; hence the name!

I spoiled myself with a set of Promarkers last week, and I don’t feel a bit guilty about it! I was getting frustrated with the Ohuhu markers – way too many bright, in your face, vibrant colours and not enough subtler, less saturated colours.

I’ve also found that as nice as the Ohuhu marker paper is (and it is lovely and smooth and fab to draw on), I much prefer Winsor and Newton, Daler-Rowney or Canson Marker paper for my alcohol marker work; the ink doesn’t sink into the paper as much and the colours are more vibrant. Also, you use less ink in creating the artwork!

Organising a new pattern, texture and motif ‘repository’ and a bout of illness

I keep faffing about with this. After getting frustrated with a six-ring A5 ringbinder and the limited number of pages that can be stored within, I discovered there’s such a thing as A5 landscape lever arch files! So one was bought post haste! I still can’t draw/write directly in it, but it makes it so much easier to store paper and finished pages. So, I’m one happy bunny.

I’ve spent quite a bit of time in the last couple of weeks starting to put together my collections of patterns etc. Especially as I’ve not been too well. I had been in contact with some people who subsequently tested positive for Covid. I had a nervous few days wondering whether I’d get it. I didn’t. Instead I had runny nose, slight cough, and a mild case or tonsillitis!

I’ve not had tonsillitis for the best part of twenty years. The last time I was getting it 4 times a year and was referred to an ENT surgeon. Let’s just say he didn’t need to use the tongue pressor thing to see my tonsils – they’re permanently large and have lots of tunnels (crypts) inside them from all the tonsillitis I’ve had from a young age. Seeing the surgeon seemed to scare the tonsillitis away; I elected not to go through with surgery to remove the tonsils. There are potentially serious complications that can arise in an, ahem, older person.

Anyhoo, It was a mild case. All covid tests for over a week were negative. But I’m left feeling run down from being ill. I’ll recover gradually!

Losing myself in reorganising and redrawing patterns etc was just what I needed. I’ve barely made a dent in my collection, especially as I’ve added loads more variations as I go! I know it’s going to be a long term project, for sure.

Other arty stuff

I have done other arty projects since my last post here. But the fatigue has been strong and my concentration and focus weak. I will post a gallery of them in the next day or two!

An Artsy Catch-up

Link to YouTube Video “Stylised Flower and Diva Dance Background WIP”

Link to YouTube Video “Tangle Pattern Bellah as a string”

Link to YouTube Video “Tangle Pattern Bellah as a string – Part 2”

It’s been a while. First, here are three images of the videos I’ve made since my last post. They’re all exploring how I can make colour and colour pens work for me. There’s also been some exploring of filler or textural patterns too; some are zentangle patterns, others are more classic pen drawing textures, and others are inspired by the work of Rebecca Blair.

I’m not quite sure where this is leading…yet. But I do know I’ll work things out.

I do like drawing a design all in one colour ink, such as a rich red-brown, or olive green, or blue-grey. But I also like drawing in black over a coloured background (like the stylised flower drawing).

Figuring out what medium I like to use to add colour is a tricky one. Of course, tradigital art (design traditionally drawn on paper with pen, colour added digitally) is a way I love to work. However, I do enjoy working in sketchbooks on ideas.

Today, I settled on Karin Brushmarker Pro pens and a Kuretake Zig waterbrush. I like to use a waterbrush. There’s a steady flow of water to the brush. I find it much easier to achieve a nice gradient with this brush. I love the vibrancy of colours in the Brushmarker Pro palette, and there are enough earthy ones to keep me happy too!

As well as working in my sketchbooks, I’ve started to sort my collection of patterns, tangles, textures and motifs into an A5 six-ring binder. I thought it was time to make sense of it all and to have a more systematic way of organising them to help in finding inspiration.

And I’ve been sleeping…lots. I’m not sure if the sleep is part of the healing process from the burnout earlier this year, the antidepressant/antianxiety medication I’m taking. My emotions are more stable, my mind is calmer, in the greater part; that is a good thing for sure.

So, thank you for bearing with me while I’m managing the changes with me at this time.

“Entangled Samplers” – Cover Page WIP, Part 2

YouTube drawing tutorial

Entangled Organica – 12 March 2023

About the art

I’ve been working on this drawing over the past three or four days when I’m alert enough to do so. I’m pleased with the final version, especially as I kept to just a few basic motifs. It was in the deep, dark depths of last night that I finished adding the final textural patterns.

Is this entirely finished? I’m still trying to figure it out! It would benefit from shade/contrast to bring out the layers and volume of the various elements. I’m still determining how I want to accomplish that; part of me thinks digitally is the way to go, but another part considers pastel pencils may work well.

There is no rush to complete it. It is in an A4 sketchbook – Talens Creations, to be precise. Now it’s been scanned in, I can either work on it digitally or edit various sections, such as the too-dense patterns in the bottom centre and the fine, white strands with blobs on the ends.

I used 05 and 01 Sakura Pigma Micron pens and an 08 White Gelly Roll pen to complete the drawing.

I tend towards the digital for such tasks. I can try things out without the fear of messing the artwork up.

Emotional and Mental Wellbeing

However, I won’t be trying to do so today. This is because I’m zonked out and so sleepy. The higher dose of anti-depressant/anxiety meds is working, for sure. I know these side effects will subside as my body gets used to the increased levels of the meds and serotonin. So all is to the good, and onwards I go.

It can be hard to be gentle with myself at times. I know I’ve not done much regarding social media or YouTube for a few months. First, I had a severe injury to the muscles between the ribs. Although the muscles are fine now, I still have tenderness/soreness with some ligaments/tendons. That will heal in time, and it’s manageable.

Then, there was a decline in my mental and emotional health, followed by the new medication. I’m so grateful you are bearing with me during my trying time.

I know this time will pass; it did in the past with the help of meds and therapy. This time, just the meds are needed. I know what provoked the decline – too many changes at once and too many people-y times too. And last week had some people-y times – another funeral to attend and some serious bits of adulting in person.

Being gentle with myself is essential this week. I don’t want wonderful, grand, or amazing days. I need days of peace, gentleness and contentment. Then, with some awe and wonder of nature, I can feel alert and aware enough to venture forth for a walk.

The comfort of a good mug of tea, quiet and calming activities -drawing, crocheting (I’m faffing around with hyperbolic crochet just for fun and because I can), and tv/films that make me smile and even laugh.

We’re all under too much pressure to be ‘productive’ and have a ‘grand day’ every day. That’s not possible. Even during dark days, I can find things that bring me some contentment and peace, sometimes awe and wonder at nature and the universe. Those small moments mean far more daily than the colossal mountain of a ‘wonderful day’ or ‘grand day’.

A gentle and good-enough day. Good enough, such an important ideal, especially from an inveterate hyper-perfectionist! I’ve been learning in the last decade or more that being good enough is good enough! Perfect is unattainable. Accepting our imperfections in whatever sphere of our lives is necessary. They are part of us.

Recently, I’ve realised I wear a mask to cover up my ‘imperfections’. Quirks or individuality could be a better way of saying imperfections. But it’s exhausting to keep that mask up. That’s part of why I’m so exhausted after being around people.

The mask I wear is from very early in childhood from the ‘don’t do that’ and other messages that made me perceive I was not good enough and just plain weird. How many of us have experienced that? So the mask was to help me fit in and not receive those criticisms. It had layers added to it over my lifetime, so much I don’t really know who I am; always trying to be the person everyone else wanted me to be rather than myself.

Again, how many of us are like this?

I discovered during EMDR that I am good enough, warts and all. So, I started to uncover the real me and show it to someone I’d built trust with. But it was just a start. Now, it’s time for me to discover more about myself and what my mask is hiding from me and learn that there is nothing I need to be ashamed of. If I can embrace my geeking out over Star Wars, steam locomotives, art, and many other things… Well, I can start to embrace those parts of me that have been hidden as they were deemed different, weird, odd, and quirky to others in some way.

It’s a process, and I’m still determining how much I’ll achieve it. But if I can accept my style of art is good enough and an expression of what goes on in my mind and heart, then I can discover and accept the other bits of me.

A genuinely unsettling time, yet one with the hope of finally answering some questions about who I really am, which is not really the person I’ve been forced to be by other people’s expectations. It’s both causing me anxiety and depression, but also it’s exciting me. Yes, we can hold more than one conflicting emotion at any time!

And, again, how many of us are like this? I do know I am not alone in such a journey.

Abstract Zentangle Inspired Art

Click on this link to watch the accompanying drawing tutorial on YouTube!

Abstract art

This was an interesting experiment. I was inspired by a video tutorial by Ellen Crimi-Trent Artist. In the video, she used a charcoal pencil to create an abstract line design. Next, watercolours were used to fill the spaces. Finally, details were added with pen.

I thought it could be a lot of fun to use this as a way to display some Zentangle style patterns. So I did! However, in true Angela style, I’d first tried not only a charcoal pencil, but a watersoluble graphite pencil, an Inktense pencil and an Inktense Outliner to create the grids on separate pieces of mixed media paper. Then I added watercolour to them to see which method of laying out the main pattern I liked the most.

As it turns out, it was the charcoal! I didn’t expect that!

I filled in the majority of the spaces with tangle patterns. Finally, I used charcoal and white chalk to add shade and highlight to each section of the design. I should say I didn’t do all the sections in the video. Oh, and I added some white highlights/patterns with a white GellyRoll pen.

The intense black of the charcoal really dials up the contrast by quite a few notches! I really did have a lot of fun playing with the illusion of volume in this design.

I’m also glad that I didn’t fill all the sections with pattern; I like that I have some simple, volumised areas whose simplicity contrasts with the complexity of the patterns.

I now have quite a few pieces of coloured, patterned paper to play with in the coming days.

Well and truly people-d out!

It’s true. I’ve not had such an intensely people-y week since well before the pandemic hit. I both feel very much by myself and a little sad about that, but also rather relieved that I get to sigh, relax and breathe for the next couple of days at least.

And with the relaxation may come the introvert hangover or social migraine! Maybe not. I’ll see tomorrow. I know as I take my time to relax, unwind, settle back into my solitary existence I will feel intense tiredness creep over me. Indeed, I can feel it beginning to extend it’s soft cloudy folds and start to enevolop me. I will give in, later. I have a few things to do first! Social media posts, a huge mug of tea, maybe something to eat. And then…I’ll see!

Zentangle Inspired Art | #DrawWithMe YouTube

Click this link to view the YouTube video tutorial for this design.

Yesterday, I found the oompf at some point to create this small drawing. The colouring looks messier in the photon than it really is, honest! But I don’t mind the grungy messiness at all!

It was an interesting journey with this design. I kept confusing myself about how to draw the main motifs and got in a right dither at some points. Still, I think it worked out fine in the end. I didn’t finish adding colour/shading in the video, but I will do it at some point…probably.

I’m still on a rollercoaster ride of ups and downs. The tiniest perceived rejection or misunderstanding can trigger a sudden tsunami of upset that takes me from quite content to rock bottom in an instant. That touchstone of contentment gets concealed by tenebrous, sharp shards of brokenness, shame, grief, despair, existential dread, loneliness, and more.

It can take me a while to recover from that sudden drop to the depths of emotions. Art helps, or writing, or, surprisingly, a walk around my local cemetery in the sunshine. I try to put a brave, smiley face on for the benefit of others I may meet or talk to. However, I’m afraid some of this inner angst will spill out. The last thing I want to do is create upset in others I care about or come into contact with. I hope those who know me will understand, especially those who know what is happening here.

Oh, all is fine. Really, it is. I’m just having to learn some, well, a lot of things about myself and understand me a bit more. I’ve been hurled a planetary-sized curveball, and it’s knocked me off my balance more than just a tad. I know that at the end of the process, I will have a much better understanding of myself and, hopefully, a better relationship with myself. But it’s going to take some time and a few hoops to jump through yet.

A clutch of Zentangle inspired designs

Link to #DrawWithMe YouTube Video

A difficult few days for me, but finally settled to do some little little art! Just a few patterns from my oldest Pinterest Tangle board!

Adding colour with Pitt Pastel Pencils

Arty Musings

Click this link to view the YouTube video where I partly colour this drawing.

A day or two ago, I started to add colour to this drawing using Pitt Pastel Pencils from Faber-Castell. I thoroughly enjoyed using these pencils, possibly more than alcohol markers! That was a big surprise! I think the paper makes all the difference. I drew the design on ClaireFontaine PaintON mixed media paper in a natural colour. This paper has a ‘tooth’ to it which the pastel pencil can be worked into to ‘fix’ it somewhat.

I tend to approach adding colour as a way of adding another layer of pattern. It’s not about representational art and giving a realistic look. For me, it’s about playing with layers and volume using contrast. If I keep this in mind, then colouring can go reasonably well.

I kept to a simple palette of three browns and two greens. Oh, and a white pastel pencil too. I also used gold ink on the ‘beads’ and found that I could add shade to it with pastel left on the paper tortillon.

I will finish adding colour to this design; it will find its way into my accordion art journal. But I won’t be finishing it today.

Overwhelmed and overwrought

My emotions are all over the place for reasons I’m not going to go into. But, just to say, it’s been a tough few days, and I’m now officially exhausted.

I’ve had to push through with work to get the first drawings for my next colouring book revised and inked in. I still have one template for Whimsical Houses to colour, which is my plan for tomorrow. Not today. I can barely keep my eyes open.

I need to be gentle with myself and give myself some quiet, relaxing time and plenty of opportunities to sleep so my brain and emotions can reset. Some Star Wars may be in order … Yes, a good dose of Star Wars always does me good!