Angela Porter

Tangle Pattern Sampler

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YouTube #DrawWithMe Video Part 1
YouTube #DrawWithMe Video Part 2

About the pattern sampler

This little pattern sampler has been fun to do! I’ve used patterns inspired by the work of Rebecca Blair, some Zentangle style tangle patterns, and possibly some variations of my own too.

I do love Rebecca’s work. I can see the influence of medieval manuscripts on her work and her love of pattern, texture and a wonderful use of textured lines too! The simplicity of her colour palettes and the myriad of ways she combines her signature patterns/textures is wonderful! I really do suggest you take a look at her work on Instagram.

I used a piece of Ohuhu marker paper that measures 4″ x 7″ ( approx 10cm x 1.7cm) and marked out the basic sections with a Uni Kuru Toga 0.3 mechanical pencil (and a ruler for the straight lines). The pencil lines were just a guide for me.

In the first video, I did most of the black line work using an 03 Sakura Pigma Micron pen. In part 2, I added colour using Winsor and Newton Promarkers in Ivory, Sandstone and Caramel.

After that, I added some fine line work and some colours using three Stabilo Point88 0.4 fine pens. These had olive-green kind of tones to them that worked well with the soft browns of the Promarkers.

I also added some black lines in places using a 0.1 UniPin fineliner pen.

Finally, I added highlights using white gel pens.

I really like the more monochrome, subdued colours of this finished drawing. The various panels really do have the feel of a needlework or cross-stitch sampler; hence the name!

I spoiled myself with a set of Promarkers last week, and I don’t feel a bit guilty about it! I was getting frustrated with the Ohuhu markers – way too many bright, in your face, vibrant colours and not enough subtler, less saturated colours.

I’ve also found that as nice as the Ohuhu marker paper is (and it is lovely and smooth and fab to draw on), I much prefer Winsor and Newton, Daler-Rowney or Canson Marker paper for my alcohol marker work; the ink doesn’t sink into the paper as much and the colours are more vibrant. Also, you use less ink in creating the artwork!

Organising a new pattern, texture and motif ‘repository’ and a bout of illness

I keep faffing about with this. After getting frustrated with a six-ring A5 ringbinder and the limited number of pages that can be stored within, I discovered there’s such a thing as A5 landscape lever arch files! So one was bought post haste! I still can’t draw/write directly in it, but it makes it so much easier to store paper and finished pages. So, I’m one happy bunny.

I’ve spent quite a bit of time in the last couple of weeks starting to put together my collections of patterns etc. Especially as I’ve not been too well. I had been in contact with some people who subsequently tested positive for Covid. I had a nervous few days wondering whether I’d get it. I didn’t. Instead I had runny nose, slight cough, and a mild case or tonsillitis!

I’ve not had tonsillitis for the best part of twenty years. The last time I was getting it 4 times a year and was referred to an ENT surgeon. Let’s just say he didn’t need to use the tongue pressor thing to see my tonsils – they’re permanently large and have lots of tunnels (crypts) inside them from all the tonsillitis I’ve had from a young age. Seeing the surgeon seemed to scare the tonsillitis away; I elected not to go through with surgery to remove the tonsils. There are potentially serious complications that can arise in an, ahem, older person.

Anyhoo, It was a mild case. All covid tests for over a week were negative. But I’m left feeling run down from being ill. I’ll recover gradually!

Losing myself in reorganising and redrawing patterns etc was just what I needed. I’ve barely made a dent in my collection, especially as I’ve added loads more variations as I go! I know it’s going to be a long term project, for sure.

Other arty stuff

I have done other arty projects since my last post here. But the fatigue has been strong and my concentration and focus weak. I will post a gallery of them in the next day or two!

Colouring Page – 14 April 2023

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I’ve created an unusual, for me, colouring page for members of the Angela Porter’s Coloring Book Fans facebook group. It’s a tesselated/tiled pattern created using one of my recent mandalas.

It’s a lot of fun to use my artwork in an app called Repper and create new, geometric patterns from it.

I did have to redraw the basic unit (tile) of the pattern to clean it up and remove some tiny details. But that let me adjust the pattern a little too.

For my coloured example, I used a palette of medieval illuminated manuscript inspired colours – red, green, gold and blue almost jewel tones.

The colour really does help to make sense of the pattern. It also brings out different ways in which the different layers and motifs are joined together, which really makes me smile!

It’s not until I look at it now that I can see the way the contrast and highlights have added a lot of layers and depth to the design.

I may have to do more of these in the future; they’re just so much fun!

Entangled Mandala Colouring Page

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I love drawing mandalas. I love the symmetry, the flow, the sense of calmness that they bring when being drawn or coloured. I am fascinated with the never-ending possibilities of mandala design. They also make it easier for me to arrange motifs and patterns when my head is filled with pink fluffy and sparkly fairy dust (all due to prescribed medication).

This one was fun and a bit different, with some new kinds of motifs in it. The colour palette is soft and soothing, with the splashes of gold give those sunshiny-joyful accents that lift it.

Yes, I know I’ve not finished adding colour. But I really, really need to finish the social media stuff and then go and get something to eat!

This is available as a colouring page to members of the Angela Porter’s Coloring Book Fans facebook group.

“Entangled Samplers” – Cover Page WIP, Part 2

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YouTube drawing tutorial

Entangled Organica – 12 March 2023

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About the art

I’ve been working on this drawing over the past three or four days when I’m alert enough to do so. I’m pleased with the final version, especially as I kept to just a few basic motifs. It was in the deep, dark depths of last night that I finished adding the final textural patterns.

Is this entirely finished? I’m still trying to figure it out! It would benefit from shade/contrast to bring out the layers and volume of the various elements. I’m still determining how I want to accomplish that; part of me thinks digitally is the way to go, but another part considers pastel pencils may work well.

There is no rush to complete it. It is in an A4 sketchbook – Talens Creations, to be precise. Now it’s been scanned in, I can either work on it digitally or edit various sections, such as the too-dense patterns in the bottom centre and the fine, white strands with blobs on the ends.

I used 05 and 01 Sakura Pigma Micron pens and an 08 White Gelly Roll pen to complete the drawing.

I tend towards the digital for such tasks. I can try things out without the fear of messing the artwork up.

Emotional and Mental Wellbeing

However, I won’t be trying to do so today. This is because I’m zonked out and so sleepy. The higher dose of anti-depressant/anxiety meds is working, for sure. I know these side effects will subside as my body gets used to the increased levels of the meds and serotonin. So all is to the good, and onwards I go.

It can be hard to be gentle with myself at times. I know I’ve not done much regarding social media or YouTube for a few months. First, I had a severe injury to the muscles between the ribs. Although the muscles are fine now, I still have tenderness/soreness with some ligaments/tendons. That will heal in time, and it’s manageable.

Then, there was a decline in my mental and emotional health, followed by the new medication. I’m so grateful you are bearing with me during my trying time.

I know this time will pass; it did in the past with the help of meds and therapy. This time, just the meds are needed. I know what provoked the decline – too many changes at once and too many people-y times too. And last week had some people-y times – another funeral to attend and some serious bits of adulting in person.

Being gentle with myself is essential this week. I don’t want wonderful, grand, or amazing days. I need days of peace, gentleness and contentment. Then, with some awe and wonder of nature, I can feel alert and aware enough to venture forth for a walk.

The comfort of a good mug of tea, quiet and calming activities -drawing, crocheting (I’m faffing around with hyperbolic crochet just for fun and because I can), and tv/films that make me smile and even laugh.

We’re all under too much pressure to be ‘productive’ and have a ‘grand day’ every day. That’s not possible. Even during dark days, I can find things that bring me some contentment and peace, sometimes awe and wonder at nature and the universe. Those small moments mean far more daily than the colossal mountain of a ‘wonderful day’ or ‘grand day’.

A gentle and good-enough day. Good enough, such an important ideal, especially from an inveterate hyper-perfectionist! I’ve been learning in the last decade or more that being good enough is good enough! Perfect is unattainable. Accepting our imperfections in whatever sphere of our lives is necessary. They are part of us.

Recently, I’ve realised I wear a mask to cover up my ‘imperfections’. Quirks or individuality could be a better way of saying imperfections. But it’s exhausting to keep that mask up. That’s part of why I’m so exhausted after being around people.

The mask I wear is from very early in childhood from the ‘don’t do that’ and other messages that made me perceive I was not good enough and just plain weird. How many of us have experienced that? So the mask was to help me fit in and not receive those criticisms. It had layers added to it over my lifetime, so much I don’t really know who I am; always trying to be the person everyone else wanted me to be rather than myself.

Again, how many of us are like this?

I discovered during EMDR that I am good enough, warts and all. So, I started to uncover the real me and show it to someone I’d built trust with. But it was just a start. Now, it’s time for me to discover more about myself and what my mask is hiding from me and learn that there is nothing I need to be ashamed of. If I can embrace my geeking out over Star Wars, steam locomotives, art, and many other things… Well, I can start to embrace those parts of me that have been hidden as they were deemed different, weird, odd, and quirky to others in some way.

It’s a process, and I’m still determining how much I’ll achieve it. But if I can accept my style of art is good enough and an expression of what goes on in my mind and heart, then I can discover and accept the other bits of me.

A genuinely unsettling time, yet one with the hope of finally answering some questions about who I really am, which is not really the person I’ve been forced to be by other people’s expectations. It’s both causing me anxiety and depression, but also it’s exciting me. Yes, we can hold more than one conflicting emotion at any time!

And, again, how many of us are like this? I do know I am not alone in such a journey.

Mandala Colouring Page – 10 March 2023

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I always enjoy drawing a mandala. It’s not often that I completely colour one in, but I’ve managed to do so with this one!

I’m not so sure about the colour choices in some places. I haven’t added enough contrast or shade in other areas. However, they’ll have to stay as they are for now. I can feel my ability to focus sliding away again as I type. It’s actually amazing I’ve done this much today.

The problems with focus are a side effect, temporary, of the medication I’m taking for anxiety/depression. This will pass; it did when I was taking them years ago. I still get some wobbly times, and surprisingly, I can still cry this time around with the medication. This is a good thing, as any upset/distress/happiness/wonder/joy still needs to be expressed!

I may have said too much here, but I know that it’s important for others to know they’re not alone when experiencing mental or emotional or physical ill health.

For me, art really helps me. Though when the ability to focus goes, it is time to nap. It’s nearly that time now, it seems.

Link to Angela Porter’s Colouring Book Fans Facebook Group.

Entangled Samplers Title Page WIP

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In today’s #DrawWithMe video on YouTube, I recreated some of the patterns and motifs I’d drawn for the title page of Entangled Samplers. With some variations! As I work on the top page, I’ll include some of these filler patterns! The idea for each page is to have a drawing that has examples of motifs and patterns with variations, all to spark creativity by being a source of inspiration and ideas.

My hand-lettering isn’t perfect; the letter sizes diminish towards the end of each line. But it may probably be good enough.

I like the bold shading in the recreation at the bottom of the image. I’ve yet to add any shading to the title page; first, I’ll finish drawing it.

I decided today to get all the pages done in a discbound format, hence the little mushroom shapes to the left of each sheet!

Mandala Colouring Page WIP

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I finally managed to get some mental focus this evening and enjoyed drawing this mandala, and adding some colour to it. Colour really does put some ‘flesh’ on the bare bones of the line drawing.

It was a soothing process for me to do, which is what I need at this time.

This colouring page is available to members of the Angela Porters Coloring Book Fans facebook group.

‘Trust’ – An Entangled Drawing

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The Drawing

I’m rapidly filling up an A5 sketchbook with drawings like this. Some have hand lettering in them, while others do not. This style of illustration is familiar to me. It comes naturally, and so is something I can cope with now. The familiarity and repetitive nature of the motifs and patterns are soothing. As I’m working in a sketchbook, there is no pressure on me for things to be perfect. And that is what I need at this time. I just need to create for the sheer enjoyment of creating. Then, there will be enough time to continue exploring other things when I’m back on form.

Mental and Emotional Well-being…

I’m often told that trust is a more positive word than hope when used in conjunction with wanting things to improve. So, I am doing my best to trust that my emotions and thoughts will improve and I won’t feel so darned sleepy and tired all the time.

I suspect I’ve been trying too hard for too long to keep up a mask of contentedness, and all is fine with me when interacting with others. But, unfortunately, it’s something I’ve done for as long as I can remember. It probably contributed to my two intense and lengthy bouts of anxiety and depression, eventually leading to me leaving teaching around 9 or 10 years ago.

After years of EMDR therapy and reflecting on the past, I thought I’d learned my lesson about not letting things get worse and worse and refusing to admit to myself I’m struggling with my mood and thoughts.

It seems that isn’t so.

However, I did reach out for help last week. So now, I have to give myself permission to ease off and give the meds a chance to work.

I had tried so hard to help myself lift my mood and dispel the dark thoughts. They wouldn’t go. Waking up in the night with my mind racing and catastrophising wasn’t good. I couldn’t do this by myself this time.

I know what has led to this state of affairs, and it’s not just one thing.

So, eventually, I worked out I needed help before I ended up in a state similar to how I was all that time ago when my Doctor told me, ‘You’ve nearly broken your mind. It needs a rest. A long rest. And these little pills will help, honestly.’

Those words got through to me. And soon after taking the first dose, my mind was magically quiet, and no longer was I being mean to myself.

There should be no stigma or discrimination about medication to help with mental and emotional ill-health. However, there is none if you need antibiotics for an infection or a plaster-cast to help heal a broken bone.

So, I’m in the process of getting the level of medication to a steady level and the side effects to subside. But, until that happens, I have no choice but to be kind and gentle to myself and not push myself to do more than I’m capable of doing. 

‘Create’ – A Zentangle Inspired Journal Page

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Click on this link to view the #DrawWithMe video on YouTube.

Today was a day to just draw for the pleasure, joy and contentment the process of creativity brings.

I knew I wanted to include some hand lettering in the design, and that’s where I started. The rest just flowed from there as it needed to. I put no pressure on myself to be perfect, nor did I have a design in mind. It was pure, intuitive art.

And that intuitive process let me relax and enjoy being able to just create for the sake of it.