health

It’s been a long while…again…

Angela Porter2 Comments

The explanation…

It’s been a good couple of months since I last added an entry to my blog. It’s not that I haven’t tried to; it’s just that I’ve not been able to. Let me explain.

Since I had Covid back in October 2024, I’ve been experiencing chronic fatigue, a scattered and unfocused mind, and an inability to stay focused on a task for much time at all. Even as I type this, I’m losing my train of thought and have to pause often to try to work out what I was about to type or to find the words that just won’t come to the forefront of my mind.

I can spend 10 to 12 or more hours a day sleeping and still not feel refreshed. Taking part in everyday events or tasks is overwhelmingly tiring; not so much physically but mentally and emotionally.

Everything physiological has been ruled out. Covid coincided with me being prescribed a new medication. I’ve stopped that medication, with the blessing of my doctor, so to speak, to see if that was the cause of this fatigue. It’s not and I’m awaiting a review with the doctor soon. I think they mentioned a review to a post viral syndrome clinic or long covid clinic.

I can get really frustrated. Even my art isn’t as prolific as before. Though I get lost in it quite easily, I can’t do much more than 30 mins to 45 mins in a stint, if I’m lucky. Even now, I’ve spent less than an hour scanning in a couple of drawings, creating the images for social media, and getting this far in my blog and I could just fall asleep again. Not even perimenopause/menopause has been this bad…

So, this is the state of my health currently, fine and good apart from this pesky fatigue.

Arty stuff

I have been drawing, but not as much as I usually would have been doing. The two images above are just two that I have completed in the last couple of months or so.

The one on the right resulted in some enquires about buying it. However something weird was going on with the contacts and nothing ever came of it. But, when I’m up to focusing on what I need to do, I will be posting some artwork either on Ko-Fi or Etsy for sale. I wish I could say when, but …

So, I’m still creating, as the fatigue allows.

And so…

…it’s time for me to end this post and go and rest again – I feel so tired and sleepy and unfocussed once again.

All I can say is thank you for bearing with me. I’ll share when I’m able to, but I don’t think there’ll be any YouTube videos for a while as they are just too much for me to accomplish at this time. Hopefully, recovery is occuring, albeit slowly. Only time will tell, that’s for sure.

May You Know …

Angela PorterLeave a comment
©Angela Porter 2019

…love, peace, joy, health.

I started drawing this one a couple of days ago using a fine nib fountain pen on paper. I’ve spent much of today finishing the drawing and I’ve just started to add colour digitally. Not sure about the colour yet though.

The words appeared intuitively, instinctively as I was drawing. Something’s obviously bubbling in my unconscious mind, most probably a result of the loving kindness meditations I’m continuing to do.

It’s always relaxing for me to draw in this way – just letting shapes and patterns flow from the nib onto the page without too much in the way of consideration or fretting about what appears. Partway through the whole drawing, or even sections, it looks like a total hot mess to me, but I push forward. To give in would be easy, to persevere takes a bit of effort. The effort is usually worth it though; my past experiences have taught me this.

I’m looking out of my window as I’m typing. I can see jackdaws swooping and wheeling in the now sunny skies. We’ve just had a wintry snow shower, which hasn’t lasted on the ground at all. The black feathery jokers are revelling in their fun and games in the air, exuberant in the dry but cool air and the sunshine. There are veritable clouds of them and I know they’ll soon return to their roosts, cloaking the winter-bare trees with their featheriness and raucous caws. I’m smiling as I watch them. I do have a big soft spot for the corvids of this world. Their antics delight me, especially the ones that zoom past the window next to my work area! They whooshed off to my left and now some are whooshing back to my right. What a lovely sight close to the end of the daylight hours!

It also brings back memories of sitting with my cat perched upon my chest, both of us looking out of the window and watching the jackdaws flying by, and in the summer dusk hours bats. His eyes would be wide and alert as his head spun back and forth, avidly watching the flying critters. I’d be equally delighted watching the antics of both the flying and cwtched up critters! So many precious times with my companion to treasure though he has been gone to pusscat heaven for nearly 9 months. I’m sure he’s still keeping an eye on things that fly , wherever his little soul, spirit is residing!

Watching the birds brings me some joy and peace too. And happy memories of my companion of sixteen years.