A request from me to you.
I enjoy using quote and adding artwork around them. So, I thought I’d ask, “What are your favourite quotes?”. Leave a comment with them – you never know I may illustrate them!
Reflecting on today’s artwork.
I have finished the illustration above; I just wanted to try some ideas out where I combine more realistic (ermm, probably stylised realistic) motifs along with some of my signature style entangled art. It’s been an interesting experiment and I quite like the results.
I have no idea how the flower at the bottom left ended up so huge in comparison to the others! Having said that, it’s most probably my favourite as I love the depth of colour in the petals.
I also like the line-art in grey. It’s subtle, adds a background to the flower without being overpowering like black line art can be.
I certainly have some things to think about here.
This is digital art, created using my usual trio of Microsoft Surface Studio, Microsoft Surface Pen and Autodesk Sketchbook Pro.
The best laid plans of mice and Angelas.
Today is one of those frustrating days where I had planned to settle down to work on a commission and then life happens.
First, I slept longer than I usually do in the morning and it also took longer for my eyes, brain and body to wake up properly and work.
I knew I needed a few hours to myself to focus and concentrate on searching out the artwork I need, organising it, setting up templates, and getting everything clear in my head.
Well, with the unplanned sleep-in, having to deal with various other stuff it’s just not going to happen today as I have something to do this evening.
This frustrates me as I had got myself sorted to get it done. However, I do know how I work best, and my next opportunity for an uninterrupted day is Saturday as I have things to do tomorrow.
Ho hum. It means I’ll work on a dangle design for tomorrow’s blog instead. Perhaps a couple so I have at least one ready for next week.
So, Angela, how are you today?
Despite sleeping in this morning, I am feeling tired. I’m also frustrated that my plans have been waylaid by circumstances beyond my control.
Once all the circumstances have been dealt with, I may just return to bed to sleep for a while. That may clear my head.
I’m doing my best not to be hard on myself, beating myself up by telling myself I’m lazy. That’s how it feels on one level, but that harks right back to childhood where I was told that’s what I was no matter what I did.
It’s a false belief that’s followed me through life. Even when I was a workaholic, I thought myself lazy for having to sleep or eat or do other things.
In hindsight, I can see I was going above and beyond what I needed to do. I can also see that the busy-ness was all about avoiding difficult emotions and thoughts. It was a coping mechanism, an unhealthy one.
I am better at self-care and understanding why it so important.
However, I still find I tell myself I’m lazy and useless when another self-care day is needed. Today that’s partly through circumstances that have developed that need dealing with. It’s also party through me feeling emotionally exhausted once again.
Hang on. I shouldn’t say, “once again”. It’s a continuation of the exhaustion I felt after therapy on Monday. I’ve had a busy time since then, with little chance to catch my proverbial breath. Yesterday, I had an appointment that I got very anxious about, anxious to the point of cold, sweaty palms and enlarged pupils and on the verge of hyper-vigilance.
That rise in anxiety drained me. However, there was little chance to calm and settle as I had other things to do soon after.
So, even though I have things going on today that I didn’t expect, I think it’s a good thing as it gives me some periods of time to do some self-care. I could’ve ended up pushing myself to work on the commission and get more and more frustrated with myself as I made mistake after mistake, lost my train of thought again and again, and lost confidence in myself and gave the inner critics a chance to get their loud-hailers out and scream at me that I’m useless, pathetic, a failure.
I’ve yet to learn it’s OK to err on the side of caution. I’ve learned that a day of self-care can make all the difference for the next day and how I feel about a project.
Taking time out means that when I turn to the project, I can feel excited, optimistic, creative, focused.
In contrast, today, I feel overwhelmed, dim-witted, lacking energy and would have to force myself to work when I know I’d mess up and have to do it all over again.
So, I’m trying to work out how to give myself permission to take some more self-care time yet again. It seems that’s all I’ve been doing lately. I’m putting myself under pressure to get projects done when I’m not in the right kind of place to work on them to a good enough standard.
Today, I’m a good lesson in how to tie yourself in knots when overwhelmed and emotionally fragile!